Tuesday, April 24, 2007

MY RIGHTS

Everyone has rights. Right now I have the right to eat 100 calorie Hostess Cupcakes because I said so and because they are yummy (and only 1 point!). I HAVE A RIGHT to have feelings, opinions and to be emotional because I am human and more so I am a woman. I HAVE A RIGHT to be bothered when people talk about things that are inappropriate. I HAVE A RIGHT to be aggravated when people act hypocritically. I'm not saying that I'm not a hypocrite, but I try hard to not be hypocritical and to learn by example of others, good or bad. I HAVE A RIGHT to be pissed off when people don't answer their phone and don't return calls. I HAVE A RIGHT to feel like a failure because I: live with my parents, have a crappy job that pays crap, and I'm single, but I know that in God's timing He'll take care of me as long as I'm faithful, patient and trust in Him. I HAVE A RIGHT to want a husband, children, a house with a white picket fence, and a successful job. I HAVE A RIGHT to be hurt when a friend tells me that, in their opinion, I've been angry lately and that's why that person hasn't wanted to hang out with me. Wow, that's compassionate and reaching out with concern making me feel loved. I HAVE A RIGHT to feel neglected when my birthday is overlooked by family and friends every year and I never do anything (fun) to celebrate. "Hi, party for one please, oh yea, and it's my birthday..." And when plans were made to go do something that I've wanted to do for years to celebrate my birthday, I HAVE A RIGHT to be unhappy when they end up not being able to happen due to work schedules, laziness, and other conflicting things going on. I HAVE A RIGHT to be extremely hurt by people that are supposed to by my friends when they say unkind, cruel, accusing things to me. I HAVE A RIGHT to feel unloved and unwanted when I clearly am truly hurting and nobody reaches out to me with concern. I HAVE A RIGHT to be offended when someone assumes that I would be offended by what they are going to say. I'm not offended by what they actually said, but by the fact that such a big deal was made because they thought I was going to be offended. And I HAVE A RIGHT to feel deserted when one of my last truly single girlfriends (not married or dating anyone) suddenly has someone new in their life and has less time for me even though they said that that would never happen. But I also have rights on how to act upon and handle situations. I HAVE A RIGHT to be jealous of others and how their lives look on the outside, but I try not to be. I HAVE A RIGHT to get upset and defend myself and get all up in your face to express my feelings. But I don't, that's not who I am. I tend to get hot, start to boil, then after some time maybe a few minutes or longer, the heat is turned off and my feelings become more of a simmer then eventually they subside and I'm over it, at least I think I am. I have chosen to use MY RIGHTS of free will given to me from God to do my best to please Him and bring Him honor. I admit, I'm not perfect and sometimes I fail, but boy do I try. I HAVE A RIGHT to hate and A RIGHT to love. And I'm going to choose love. I HAVE A RIGHT to love and appreciate the friends I do have that I've grown distant with but who still reach out to me with love when they see I'm hurting. I HAVE A RIGHT to love them back despite how others may feel. I HAVE A RIGHT to turn my affairs, friends, situations, and life over to God because really only through Him will I be able to get through whatever it is I'm going through by surrendering it all to Him. I HAVE A RIGHT to give it all to God. Maybe I'm just over reacting and being too analytical like I normally am. Then again, maybe I'm under reacting. But darnit, I HAVE A RIGHT to blog about whatever I want to blog about, and express myself however I want to express myself. Read it or not, that's YOUR RIGHT.

*The blog is solely for me to get things off my chest. If you feel offended in anyway, I'm sorry, that was not my purpose. But maybe take a few steps in my shoes and see where I'm coming from.

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