Sunday, October 28, 2007

Poopie

This one's for you Katie...

THE POOPIE LIST


GHOST POOPIE- The kind where you feel the poopie come out, but there is no poopie in the toilet.
CLEAN POOPIE- The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
WET POOPIE- The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with a stain.
SECOND WAVE POOPIE- This happens when you've done poopie-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to poopie some more.
POP-A-VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD POOPIE- The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
LINCOLN LOG POOPIE- The kind of poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
GASSEY POOPIE- It's so noisy, everyone within ear shot is giggling.
DRINKER POOPIE- The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable traits is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
CORN POOPIE- (self-explanatory)
GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-POOPIE POOPIE- The kind where you want to poopie, but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
SPINAL TAP POOPIE- That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.
WET CHEEKS POOPIE- (The Power Dump) The kind that comes out of your butt so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.
TIJUANA POOPIE- It smells so bad your nose burns and the room must be condemned.
UPPER-CLASS POOPIE- The kind that comes from people who think their poopie doesn’t stink.
THE SURPRISE POOPIE- You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you're about to fart, but OOPS! a poopie.
THE DANGLING POOPIE- The poopie refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done poopie-ing it. You just pray that a shake or 2 will cut it loose.
THE WHIPLASH POOPIE- The kind where you push and strain until your eyes are blood shot and the poopie just starts to come out when OOPS! it goes back in.
THE PEBBLE POOPIE- This is the poopie that feels like a log coming out, but looks like a rabbit pellet.

1 comment:

Katie said...

i love it! i'm printing it out and going to use it from now on to describe my poopie ;)